If you have to ask, we’re going to assume you’re pretty vanilla! “What does that mean?!” Don’t worry—we’re going to explain everything about being “vanilla,” BDSM, and the world of BDSM hookups in this article! Let’s start with “vanilla.”The term “vanilla” is used to describe either a person or a type of sex. Essentially, it means straightforward, non-kinky sex, like only banging in the missionary position! Basically, if you’ve never experimented with toys like handcuffs, whips, or the like, then your sex life is probably pretty “vanilla”!
So what is BDSM? Well, it stands for bondage, discipline/dominance, submission, and masochism. Bondage is fairly self-explanatory; it involves tying your partner up. Submission is a bit more complex. This can involve submission in the form of physical submission (such as rape fantasies) or emotional submission (such as being verbally degraded). Dominance is similar; essentially, you’re “dominating” your partner, either physically or emotionally.
Submission is giving yourself up physically or mentally to your partner. Masochism is gaining sexual pleasure from being emotionally or physically “hurt.” This might sound a bit dark, but actually, the entire thing is about role-playing. No one involved in this type of hookup actually gets seriously injured: that’s why there’s a safe word involved (a pre-designated word which a partner uses to alert their partner that they’re at their mental or physical limitations).
Whether you’re already into BDSM or simply considering the idea of a BDSM hookup, you’ll be happy to know that finding a kinky encounter online actually isn’t that challenging. Although it’s been made a bit more popular thanks to the pop-culture hit “50 Shades of Grey”, the BDSM subculture as a whole has never really been mainstream. In previous generations, the only way to find fellow kinky enthusiasts was to attend a BDSM event, often hosted in a designated BDSM club. These days, however, there’s a large online BDSM community that makes it easier for newcomers to join and old-timers to make it to the party!
If you’re relatively new to the world of BDSM, then jumping headfirst into the scene might not be the best idea for you. If that’s the case, we’d actually recommend holding off on the hookup until later. Instead of a hookup, search Hookupsource for local BDSM singles online! Once you find one (or a couple), talk to them and ask to explain the culture out. We won’t lie: you’re definitely not going to be into everything you read, and that’s ok! There are many different niches within the world of BDSM, and it’s important that you figure out what you’re into (and what you’re not) before your first kinky date. If you’re not ready to talk to a single interested in kinky practices just yet, consider heading over to our chat rooms to try & read about your favorite type(s) of BDSM. If it gets you going, it might be for you, and you can always connect with a hot and kinky single at HookupSource!
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If you want to find a BDSM hookup, then you have a few options. You can:
Just trust the experts here at HookupSource to find the perfect partner for you! True, our entire staff isn’t into the BDSM scene, but we do have a lot of kinky people who work here. As such, we are experienced and know which algorithms to use to help singles like yourself find a hookup (and, more importantly, which ones don’t). Unfortunately, when it comes to the world of online hookups & dating, there are a lot of sites that seem like great resources initially but are actually just there to take your money. If you try to find a partner anywhere else yourself, then you could fall victim to one of these scams. On the other hand, if you trust us, we’ll help you steer clear of the fake services & connect you with real kinky singles who live nearby!
Once you’ve decided you’re ready to find a BDSM hookup online, then the first thing you’ll need to do is sign up for our hookup service! Why us? For the first-timers, we offer you a kinky hookup service with sections specifically designed for BDSM lovers, fetish fanatics, & other kinky individuals. Be prepared for a whole new experience when you sign up for this site. We keep Hookupsource relatively safe for work, but we’d probably recommend only accessing it when you’re alone.
While we offer more than simply a dedicated BDSM hook up service, HookupSource is nonetheless a valuable resource for finding a kinky hookup since many BDSM enthusiasts frequent the site. You can find everything here, from a casual fling to matches and even long-term dating with kinky undertones to it!
While you might think the best place to meet a new BDSM partner for your first BDSM encounter after you meet at HookupSource is at your place (or theirs), neither of these places is actually the right choice. In fact, the best place to meet is in public, like at a restaurant! Why? Well, before the kinky hookup, you’ll want some time to get to know this person, discover their kinks, share your own, and discuss fantasies/limitations. Leaving these conversations until you’re halfway through the kinky hookup is unlikely to yield a positive experience for either of you.
Establishing a base point (and ground rules) upfront will ensure that you’re both on the same page, share the same expectations, and will let you know what to expect when you actually have the hookup. This also gives you a chance to plan for the kinky encounter ahead, which might include setting up a “playroom” and getting the proper equipment. Once you actually match with a woman, she’ll likely want to talk quite a bit, so that’s something to consider!
Hookup Right NowBefore you can have your first BDSM hookup, you’ll need to join a kinky hookup site (as the one we’re offering to you), but that’s not the only thing on your to-do list. You’ll also need to make sure your profile is up-to-par! If you haven’t already, now is the time to determine whether you’re dominant or submissive. It’s also possible that you’re a “switch” (someone who enjoys being on both ends). Where you fall on the spectrum will determine the type(s) of partner(s) you’ll be searching for.
If you’re a dominant, then you’ll need to find a sub. Subs are usually pretty easy to find on our site, so you shouldn’t have any trouble finding a partner for your first kinky hookup. On the other hand, finding mistresses (dominatrixes) won’t be much of a challenge either. Many people actually pay for these services, but there’s no point in doing that when you can find a perfectly suitable kinky partner ready for a hookup using Hookupsource and our huge userbase of kinky singles!
There’s a difference between a BDSM hookup & BDSM dating. As expected, you’ll start with a BDSM hookup first, but if everything goes well, you might find yourself yearning for an actual relationship with this person. This can go one of two ways: some BDSM enthusiasts want to keep their relationship purely sexual. As such, they continue to enjoy kinky hookup experiences together on a regular basis but never actually go on to romantic encounters. The alternative is traditional dating, just with a BDSM hookup here and there! Both of these setups work well, but which one is right for you depends entirely on what you want from the relationship (and what your partner is looking for). You definitely shouldn’t bring this up on your first meeting, but it may become a topic of conversation later on.
You probably came to HookupSource.com wondering where to find BDSM partners online: hopefully, we’ve answered that question - here! Truthfully, anyone can find a BDSM hookup, even without a dedicated site to help them out. However, finding your perfect kinky hookup partner is definitely a lot easier with a bit of guidance, which is why we’re here! In this article, we’ve gone over how to start your journey here, what to expect, and how to take the relationship to the next level (specific to BDSM). However, if you’ve made it this far & decided that the kinky hookup lifestyle isn’t for you, that’s fine too. We have plenty of articles on more “vanilla” dating as well! Whatever your sexual (or romantic) desires are, you can always trust the experts at HookupSource.com to point you in the right direction. Thanks using our site!